Weak In

Days in I feel like a monster
hiding out in a neighbor's cave
Days out I feel like a harbor
holding in out over the seas

Nights in I feel like a stranger
lurking around inside your window
Nights out I feel like a storm
hovering inside around the town

Weeks in I feel like a martyr
speaking above below my wisdom
Weeks out I feel like a hero
breaking below above your history

Months in I feel like a cynic
bashing everything within boundaries
Months out I feel like a sunbeam
warming within everything of foundation

Years in I feel like a stoic statue
holding all unto proved opinions
Years out I feel like a true person
giving unto all my every efforts

Careful, Careful

Quietly and silently watching
each moment carefully treading
tiptoeing and lightly stepping
across the temperamental hearts

Wistfully and urgently pleading
within each conversation seeking
patiently with words heeding
looking far into the futures

Curling and questioning seeing
emotions within me breaking
re-enacting and flighty trekking
holding onto lives now

Melancholy Baby

When the numbness creeps in
we're unsuspecting sitting victims
because it attacks so slightly
ravaging quiet hours we see
everything we can't hold onto
everything trustworthy moves

Filled picture frames
and writing games
the lists of wants
always outweigh everything
placed all together
your doubts consume
my time in my life with you

Pity spits in the faces
of self loathing creations
just smile and carry on
with the daily grind
because recognizing
what you won't find
will come at such a late time
to act when what you
didn't realize this all was amiss

Melancholy baby
with sugar-free shine
don't mind it, don't take the time
enriching the way we like to
say hello
play favorite
for all of my trying

No, But if So Simple

She'll tell you a tale
of sorrow and woes
and stand to unveil
more wallowing she knows
of truth, and love,
and glorious thoughts,
inside a heart and mind so tough
to find many traits
are often sought

She tells of the past
of it's great many memories
to remove current guilt cast
upon herself to wonder
"can I be?"
in a happier world
if only it was me

Alone and pieced more shattered
than the outside
so self-bitterly battered
When she says and talks aloud
the words float away
without taking sound

Sharing with other unchanged, askew
to wallow in unmistakable woes
cover everything, to hide,
carry on to suffice
everyone's picture of her
in her own view

making not a stir in her story
but telling herself to be pleased
and laugh when urged

Follow Crimson

In my bones, they feel it
These bones are so restless
Shuttering in and delving out
Anger in crimson shoving doubt
Like paper planes the window fly
Light and airy oh moody my
Holding onto my rock rightly
With both hands straining tightly

In my eyes, they can’t see it
These eyes stare forever
Up and down sewn all around
His face in front of me
Her face behind what I see
The picture of red shoes from him
Now haunt and covet by whim
The damned shadows past follow