Filler

Drunk with exhaustion
I stumble through the nights
Weary and in shambles
Creating incoherent dreams

Dragging my feet
Feeling an invisible march
Beyond physical tiredness
And mental demise

Stress is the pillow
I lie my heavy head upon
Clocks blurry the passed time
That worry calls me on

Anxiety overridden
Eating me alive
Since insides are only filler
Held up by my shadow

Tall Bow

Bending like a flower

Bending like a bow

But it’s the bending on and on

That endures the lows

Musical notes flutter around

Heart beats fluid and strong

But it’s the consistent beat

That keeps a common bond

Who I was years ago and

Who I am now and today

Thinks about that person

Who was and is just different

In light, in airy, in heavy ways

I still stand taller

I can laugh harder

My dreams are fewer

And I still carry on sharper

You Bounce

The timing itself is never right
You never stand still enough
To catch up with mine

I enjoy your mind just so
You keep things bouncing
With a quick word and go

Wondering what isn't heavy
These things that are spoken
Keeping the lightness maybe

This passion for life; its dancing
Your experiences are inspiration
For dreams and plans you bring

What feeds me in my soul
You have a knack in wanderlust
It keeps me in the clouds meandering

Just to pick it apart I dream
Over tea and your strings
Bouncing  in on my days

New Me

The old me the one me

Is within me

My habits die hard

Because they don’t breathe

My habits tell stories

That don’t match my smile

My stories keep on churning

Unmatched with old guile

Simple words and moments

And the faces they match

Spring up like a fountain for

Memories your ears catch

The old me is not new

Buried deep in there

Back being guarded always

With no habits to care

The Day

The day the day
how it gathered
as it went

I was halfway crass
and cruel in my tone
Something escapes me
or something has gone
Missing

I miss my old me
most times
When I didn't have time
to wallow in remembering
to keep it all
together

Each sharing of words is
like a glue
it keeps my face
on just straight
Staying awake in
everyday life

Fine Time

Some of the time
it's a movie reel I've seen
To remember the moving
pictures in the moments
I can compare the feel

Of the yesteryear and
glimpses of today for
the tomorrow I hope to have
So my future-self can
reminisce in every memory

The actors in the movies all
play their parts
well just like these
in my life

Much of it is taken in that
way props decorated convey
The dirty corner
that catches
my eye
stands for many things-
neglected, unkempt,
in need of expertise

Some actors feel
they fit them
finely and free

Just as the loneliness washes
over so slowly
the silent screaming
is there

We're all trained in reaction-
with a smile on my face

Oh Mister

Mister Possibilities
You always come to
haunt me
I follow you so easily
down a rabbit hole
or two
But whatever dreams
may bring is all I see
Any inkling of feelings
hold me in your second

Oh Mister Possibilities
You are what you
seem to be
Achieve a glimmer of
hope in my own
impossibilities
What once was
could never again be
And even what once
never fruited anything
Still haunts me

Oh Mister Possibilities
you always send me
dreaming
To visit a past moment
stuck in vivid memories
But what I remember
is not at all
the reality

Because Mister Possibilities
you have only
let downs
for me
Hell, then, because of what
was said
What is daunting me is
just a mirage
gone in a second I see

Mister Possibilities
you bring me dreams
I unwillingly follow
And end up in misery
Please
Please

Mister Possibilities
Don't bring me a treat
Don't give me a scene
Just leave me be
in day's normal routine

Westward Muse

My muse, my muse, my muse has gone astray. Gone westward and gone there to stay. When looking I don't find, When speaking I don't hear, Familiar musings so I could tilt my ear. And the thickness of the days each Gone with the sun and ended incomplete. When remembering I see, When storytelling I doubt, Times of sharing tea remain, singularly. Old arts and myths can collide And find me taken back to that time: The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam, Unbearable Lightness of Being, Stories of these unfold in my mind.

driving

Driving nice in silence
Jazz me up with your fast acts
Slip of the tongue
In a sneaky masquerade

Don't give my heart or heartstrings
any whipping whiplash
Don't get mixed up in the background
Listening to all backsplash

Fall Moment

My hands get needy
when my thoughts get graspy
and I ponder for a second
about a wary predicament

Funny how your biggest
adversary is always yourself
but not funnier than being
yourself and lying the thickest

My racing brainwaves go in
patterns and thoughts to circles
and I wonder negatively again
about self-pain incurred

Speaking up does just as much
as quietly revolving does
both for deflecting and
earning good and bad was

Fault

Somehow a secret I've always kept
Has always kept me safe at night
And through the busy-ness of day
Except somehow it got lost
Away it crept.

I know I loved you first.
You are everything to me instead
I feel like the heaviness of life
Let me forget so I did not remember to fight.

My fault; my fault.
My actions brought down
My own previous un-beautiful world
But now inside a new place I'm caught.

Lover of

you are a lover of words
and the music they follow
they dance in your mind
and sing to be swallowed

you are at first introduction
more passionate on the inside
but muse to me always
and sometimes too much then

Note he found

And I and thee
swallowing through
and prick the eye
hearing in, too
for a tasteful banquet
quick to quit it
with just a droplet
hand me the fit
to foster me in it

Whimsy

Sometimes the walls are shaking
Sometimes my thoughts break me
My inconsistencies trembling
Put together in agony they send thee

You are an island forever tempted
You are always conversations whispered
Childlike playing in whimsical fancy
Throwing emotions around to thwart me

Sometimes my strength it crumbles
Sometimes the right path disappears
Like magic dust blown and big dreams too
Easiness of the world completely tumbles

Carted Jem

There is no misunderstanding
Of the words that swirl around
My ears burn with remembering
And pause here with daily escaping

The paperback edition still lies
There where I see it daily so often
Waiting for me to complete the end words
Afraid the last pages might unravel

Something I would carry possibly as
E.E. C. did as the sky of the sky flows
Something so large and above words
With a simplicity completely its own

Okay to be an unknown in a full day
To have your smile in rabid thoughts
All your own sneaking a quiet gander
A gilded muse with hidden wings behind

slightly

there is a seething
in your seeing
underneath and buried deep
crawling inwards
and under my skin
bringing consumed within

But Instead

Unlike the flower
I am not to be just watered down
Or spoken softly in whispers to
But instead earth-shaken around

The parts cannot be gathered
In your baskets of curiousness
Or misunderstanding good willing
But instead scooped up wholly with briskness

Like a light breeze your words
They gather no speed, no meaning
Or stop days in their hours of tasking
But instead disappear invisible to see

And mine, all sections and worries
Carry not an ounce of willful discerning
Or fathom the deep abysmal hind stories
But instead keep me internally yearning

Take a Sigh

Silence is golden
And riptides in warfare
Smug in my face
Scream at me to scare

I can't tell you the rules
I can't show you my ways
You would crumble worse
Decisions far greater to sway

No good to bottle it up
But be carried away sorting
Vastness engulfing
My ability to breathe floating

Take a sigh a knee a moment
To clear open a pathway
Come home to see easiness
Just to live for today

Brim of Summer

‘Tis the summer time
And I get so hungry
The thirst just kills me
Bring me back to the light side

Bask my face and my heart
In the sun rays around
Warming me from the outside
Reaching in slowly to start

The summering activity
Becomes mouth-watering
In imagination, day-dreaming
I’m taking it all, give it to me

Instead of burning both ends
Of the candle-stick daily
Fill my hands up and fully
And spill over my brim intensely

Asking

Never before have I asked
as now I plead your behest
My wish for you to take me
away and above my reality

Never before have I wished
to be rescued from every day
My mind is open to life
outside it's own troubles find

Never before have I doubted
the security of intentions
My negative feelings have
nothing to do with my emotions